Friday, November 28, 2014

Taking your power back

I have started reading "Women Who Run with the Wolves" by Clarissa Pinkola Estes, I have actually owned the book for a couple of years now but have not read it until this last week. It was time and many things have fallen into place for this book to come into my life. I have been going through some internal conflict and trying to remain the peacemaker in a very hostile relationship. My belief was I had no way out of it, that I was powerless in some way. I had been playing the victim for so long that I was finally exhausted from silence. As my therapist puts it, the hooks were being thrown and I was the log sitting there being hooked. I thought that was the best way to deal with the situation. What I started to realize was the toll it was taking on my soul, on the Wild Woman that I am.

If you have read the book, then you understand the term Wild Woman, and if you have not what I can say is this - it is not the image that you just painted in your mind. It is not the out of control Wild, it is actually the woman that has her pelt on and stands strong, while still running wild with what is in her soul. You see I have remained silent for too long, I grew up in a culture that silence is best for a woman. I grew up in a society that says silence is respectful, and to learn to adapt to people so that you remain in acceptable social form. I have been able to show who I really am in many aspects of my life. Confrontation is one of those places that I have felt it is best to be silent and things will work out. I couldn't have been more wrong. You see, what I am learning is that I have to share my voice for me. I can not be silent when people are trying to attack me any way that they can. It does not mean that I have to attack or that giving any emotion to this will help at all, that will actually take my power away. What I have to do is create a boundary that is so tight, so small that everything outside of that is no longer within my energy space.

You see, we all are instinctual in nature and we all have the wild woman archetype within us. What I am learning is the beauty and strength of my female nature. I have brought two remarkable children through my body into this world, and I have nourished lives, and cared for others. But through that and through relationships and some societal expectations I have forgotten the Wild Woman in me, the fearless being, the creative being, the primal being. I have let my silence take me over, and I have let my expectations of what I should be allow me to be silent. My voice has been lost, and I have found it once again. I am ridding myself of guilt and shame, and I am going to feed my hunger for power, grace, love and creativity. I will not allow myself to be taken advantage of, nor will I allow myself to be quiet any longer. I encourage others to speak your truth, to live a life that is full of passion and joy, to be proud of who you are. To walk through the door to your life, to walk in strength and passion. To stand up and be vulnerable and state your needs and wants. I encourage you to stand tall, put your pelt on and not allow others to take your power. This will create a peaceful life, one that you are the driver of. This is not about fighting or confrontation, this is about standing in your power, tall and proud and singing the songs of life and spirit through you. All struggle, anxiety and confrontations are gone when you stand and be you, the fearless you. No guilt, no shame, no fear.....YOU, beautiful, strong, primal, confident, creative, emotional and passionate. That is who you are, all the other stuff is just what we have learned. I am standing, honoring myself, loving myself and not allowing anyone the power to take any of this away. Own your power, stand in your magnificence the world needs us. Namaste :)

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